More questions than answers

How quickly a week changes things, huh?

This is just a perfect example of why you just can't react to every little thing during your team's 162 game season. Where were we last Thursday? We were five losses lighter, that's where we were.


Look, it's just a matter of peaks and valleys, and this team doesn't appear to be one of those smooth sailers. I mentioned in my last post on Monday, that it was gut-check time, and that this Padres series would be a solid indication of where this team really is.

With the smooth sailing of the few series in the review mirror, it was time for the Gyros to step up-- on the road, without Rowand and a healthy DeRosa, and after a devastating loss to their arch rivals. A couple guys showed up in the San Diego series, namely Cain, Sanchez, and to a lesser extent, Uribe, but it just wasn't enough. This of course is saying something, because the Giants were swept by a final score of 9-4. No, that wasn't the final score of Wednesday's game, those were all the runs scored the entire series.

I believe this 2010 team to be different from last year's model, because up until this grisly San Diago disaster, I saw a vastly improved team. Hell, even in the Eckstein game, Juan Uribe donged one off of one of the best closers in the game in Heath Bell to tie up the game. That was huge, and it just wasn't something we saw last year.

Let's talk Wellemeyer for a minute.

Todd Wellemeyer is not the good version from two seasons ago. This is a "Spring Training Superstar" who's lost his marbles and his command. This quote from Baggarly via Twitter doesn't make me feel good:

"I didn't think Todd Wellemeyer could punt his rotation spot on the basis of three starts. This first inning is making me think otherwise."

You know when a non-knee jerk baseball authority is freaked out, it's time to really freak the eff out.

You don't need to see any stats to know that the dude is off his rocker, and is walking waaaaay too many dudes. But hey, people like stats, so let's look at how gross they really are. The guy is averaging almost 7 walks per 9 innings, an obscene 8.16 ERA, and a a WHIP just below 2. It's just fugly...

It's not like the guy is just giving up Texas Leaguers, seeing-eye grounders and running into bad luck. He's allowing more baserunners than should be legal, and is paying dearly for it.

Let's assume worst case scenario here for a minute, and that the guy needs to be replaced. There are a few options: Kevin Pucetas (AAA), Joe Martinez (AAA), Pedro Martinez (Free Agent), Jarrod Washburn (Free Agent).

None of them are particularly attractive to me, but hey, we're talking 5th starter here. We need a guy who won't pitch us out of ballgames. While the Pedro/Washburn route is certainly intriguing, it's unlikely. Pucetas is likely the guy, since he did indeed have solid spring.

However, Pucetas has given up 17 hits and 8 walks in 16 innings (3.94 ERA) so far in Fresno, which is certainly not something that makes me feel a whole lot better. After all, T-Dub's problem is baserunners, and that's the last thing we need while the offense struggles.

Joe Martinez, on the other hand is 1-0 with a 0.90 ERA in 10 innings thus far.

To be mentioned also is that there's some dude named Eric Hacker in AAA that is absolutely beasting around. Truth be told, I've never heard of the guy before, but he's 3-0 with a 1.10 ERA, 0.80 WHIP, and 16 K in only 16.1 innings. So for what it's worth, we've got this 27 year-old unknown down there mowing down the PCL.

Whatever the decision is, it probably needs to be made quickly, because we've got the Cards, Phils, and the damned dirty Rockies coming into town beginning on Friday.

Other random thoughts:

-- Is it possible that the Padres are a better team than they appear to be?

-- I bet the Gyros don't get swept by the Madres if Zito plunked a Dodger, resulting in a bench clearing confrontation

-- Velez is not a good outfielder

-- If Bruce Bochy refuses to play Bowker every day, how will we ever know if the guy can play every day? How do we know he really can't hit lefties? He's only gotten 3 ABs against them this year. Yes, he's gone 0-3 in those AB's, but it's like come on dude. If he was like 0-20, against lefties, then I'd say, "Okay, I understand."

This is the same confidence-shattering crap that we see time and time again from this organization. Stick his ass out there, and let him effing play. If he sucks after 150 ABs, then fine, do something else. God, I'm so sick of this.

-- My buddy proposed a hypothetical trade today. Assuming Madison Bumgarner stops sucking so bad and regains trade value... would you trade him for Carl Crawford, assuming we could sign Crawf longterm? He's eligible to be a free agent next season. Food for thought. That would be a lottaaaaa triples.

-- If you're like, "We'll sign a big bat this coming offseason." Let me tell you now, that you're dreaming. Here's the list of 2011 free agents. There's Carl Crawford and a whole lotta nothing.

Anything we get to improve this offense in the long term will have to come via trade, at a steep price. This is why there is such a high premium on great young hitters.

-- I hate the Dodgers all over again...

-- Is it possible that we suck on the road? Yeah we swept a terrible Houston team in Texas, but, yeah... we haven't done well since then outside SF...

-- If you're not on Twitter, I think you should, especially if you like venting frustrations during games. It's almost like a Giants chat room at times. I like to talk Giants a lot, so obviously it works for me.

-- Here's a great example of Twitter can be cool. I had this "conversation" with Nick Mangold, starting center for the New York Jets:

The Dodgerhater: PETA freaks protesting outside the KFC in San Rafael. This may be a perfect time to try that new Double Down. Haha! @NickMangold is down.

Nick Mangold: @TheDodgerhater where do I sign up?

The Dodgerhater: We could organize an eat in. Gotta check to see where the PETA jerks are going, then march an army of dudes into the KFC.

Nick Mangold: I like it dude

Shut up! How many starting NFL players did you talk about KFC and PETA with on Twitter? Hmm? Oh zero, that's what I thought!

-- Go Giants, Go Sharks.

Gut check time: the first of many

Wow, Sunday really sucked. I mean, really, really sucked.

There we were, just cruising along, thoroughly enjoying another gem by Zeets, shutting out the Blue Bastards on the field and shutting up the criminals in the stands at the same time. Then, just like that, we were punched in the gut. It wasn't even a normal punch in the gut, it was a sucker punch, totally out of nowhere. Just like that, the game was over. We were still left breathless and confused, just like at the end of the Sharks game last night. It's like, are you effing kidding me? A bottom of the 8th pinch hit dong by The One Who Shall Not Be Named, followed by a hockey playoff game where we outshoot the opposition 50-16, and end up scoring the only goal of the game on ourselves in overtime?

Sunday, April 18th, was one of the worst Bay Area sports days in recent memory.

As for the Giants, this first Padres game represents the first true challenge of the year. Until the Dodger series, where we easily could've swept, there has been little to no adversity in this young 2010 season. As the video below (at 1:08) will reinforce, the Giants were indeed "Drivin' along, drivin' along", until we hit a truck tire in the middle of the road." Let's just hope we bought our brake pads from Callahan Auto instead of the other guys.



As we know, how a team rebounds from sucker punches, and the fashion in which they respond to injuries dictates how far they go. Mental toughness, resolve, and a short memory are all huge parts of a successful baseball team, especially because it is one long-ass haul.

With Rowand on the DL with those pesky facial fractures, DeRosa's tender hammy, and Romo's confidence shaken, the San Diego series will be huge.

It's not so much what we've lost in Rowand, but how we'll replace him, and how we're able to keep chugging along. Monday in San Diego, it will be the Geno Velez show, and I assume Schierholtz and Torres as well against the lefty Clayton Richard.

Velez has been a huge surprise with his hitting thus far. The guy affectionately known as A.U., Geno, The Somali Pirate, and the Pharaoh has 4 extra base hits, 7 RBI, and hitting .350. Not only that, but the guy has taken a few walks, and is sporting a stat nerd-arousing .435 on base percentage. I never thought I'd say this, but I'm comfortable with A.U. playing every day until Rowand returns.

Back to the Dodgers series for a minute.

The fact that no Dodger was drilled is totally unacceptable. Whether that waste of life known as Vicente Padilla intentionally drilled Rowand in the head is beside the point. It's baseball etiquette. You hit one of our guys, we hit one of yours. Hell, even throw it totally behind them, and if it's a close game, hit them the next day. I was wholly shocked that Zito, who plunked Prince Fielder in spring, didn't nail Matt Kemp or that jerkoff Casey Blake during Sunday's game.

If the plunked Dodger became enraged, began gesturing wildly towards the mound while spewing expletives and the benches cleared, that's what I refer to as a team-building exercise. Even without a brawl, any "Us Versus Them" activity breeds unity, and it no longer becomes about retaliation, but about trust in one another and the bigger purpose of survival as one unit.

Try finding a stat for that.

Despite technically dropping two of three from the Doyers, I still saw a ton of character from these guys in each game. As I said before, there's something different about this team, and I no longer believe we're ever out of a game-- not like last year.

Let's plow through San Diago and get back on track!

Quick note: BOCHY! FREE JOHN BOWKER! LET THE GUY PLAY! HOW WILL HE EVER HIT LEFTIES IF YOU NEVER LET HIM TRY! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASSSSEEEE!

What's not to love?

I don't mean to keep gushing like a North Hollywood white trash school girl looking at a Justin Bieber Dodgers billboard, but I just can't help it. I just love this Giants team. Maybe sometime soon I'll write something about home runs or stankeyes or cool shirts emblazoned with Krukowisms, but right now I just can't. I'm too excited.

I'm too excited about Timmy and Kung Fu, and even too excited about Rowand and Renteria. I just love this Giants team.

Now, it probably goes without saying that most people reading this already root for the Gyros. Then it probably goes down to about 80% of readers who actually really love the Giants. There is a difference however between loving the team you root for, and actually loving the roster, and the way they get things done-- a big difference.

None of us really loved the 2009 Giants team. Sure it was gutsy, and did waaaay more than was expected of it, but Lord knows it was deeply flawed, and among the more frustrating things ever. Did we still love the Giants? Hell yeah we did. Just like we hated the Dodgers. That never changes.

The difference between 2009 and this 2010 season still in its early infancy, is that I think I may just love this roster and this team. Would I feel differently if we'd started 1-6? Probably. Who wouldn't? If we were to go 1-6 in our next 7 games, would I still love the roster? Yeah, I think I would, and here's my sick "under the influence of winning" rationalization.

There isn't a guy on this team that I hate. I mean, yeah, I really didn't like "The Retarded 'R' Brothers" of 2009 (Rowand & Renteria). Many of us used the words hate towards them. I was close. Hell, I think I even had a poll question up here last season asking if you "truly hated Edgar Renteria". Sick, I know, but look, could you blame us? Those two make way too much money and played horribly.

I don't think our "hatred" of those two guys was real. It was disgust and frustration, but I think when fans truly hate a ballplayer, they cannot be forgiven and cannot achieve new life with that fanbase. Think Milton Bradley being run out of Wrigley; now that's some serious hate right there. Think Stephen Jackson and how he left the Warriors.

Back to Rowand and Renteria's situation, which is very similar to another guy you know.

May I present to you Barry Zito as exhibit A. He's still borderline with some folk, but he's managed to somehow resurrect his Giant career for the most part in a matter of 25 or so starts. Plus, he plunked Prince Fielder and is now a supposed "leader in the clubhouse".

Remember how much we "hated" Zito?

We didn't care what happened to him. We wanted his contract bought out, we wanted him in the bullpen, we wanted him in Fresno... just anywhere but Mays Field. It was honestly the closest thing to hatred I've seen since "The Great Lunatic Fringe/Armando Benitez Revolt of Twenty-ot-Seven".

The point is, when players begin to perform at an acceptable level, they instantly become likeable, or at least tolerable. With Renteria opening the season at a .440 clip and hitting that dong the other day against Atlanta, I'm thiiiiiiiissssss close to already forgiving and forgetting. Same thing with Rowand. He still swings at a lot of crap, but dude, after his 0-10 start in Houston to open the season, guess what he's hitting. Seriously, guess.

Aaron Rowand is hitting .435 since those first two games. Not only that, but he's even knocked in a few runs.

What I'm trying to say here is that with Zeets, Row, and Edgar on their way to being embraced by Giants Nation, there's no one left to dislike, and by that logic, you like the rest of the roster. Right?

No one screams "Freakin Bum!" at you when you peruse the roster. Billy Mota? He's been pretty solid so far. A.U. Velez? Guy's funny looking and we don't know what we're getting from him, but hey he hit that double the other day! Bowker? Schierholtz? Whiteside? Huff? Wellemeyer? They're all okay. See what I mean?

It just struck me during the shellacking of the Buckos on Monday. These guys are just fun to root for and to watch play. Sandoval is just plain hilarious in every way, plus he's not off-balance anymore (which scared me the other day if you'll recall). Bengie is also amusing in his own way, and he's hitting like the pressure is off. Huff is like a walking comedy act, and I have a feeling he's going to be a KNBR staple at some point this season. And that's without even mentioning what a pleasure it is to watch this pitching staff go to work.

Anyway, I hope you'll forgive my gushing over this team. I can't help it. If you have a more cynical view of things and would rather focus on the past or on how many games we've played thus far, please, I encourage you to seek your fan-perspective blogging from another site.

Around here, I love this team, and I don't care who knows it.

So far, pretty damn good

So? Whaddaya think?

Was all my (and possibly your) optimism unfounded? Things are clicking, and this team appears to have left Scottsdale ready to deal and rake.

And yes, I did predict the sweep of the Astros right here.

The Astros are not exactly a stiff test, but what they've been to the Giants is twofold. Firstly, they were a perfect team to warm up against without being a real threat. Secondly, they provided an opportunity to last year's stiffs and this year's hopefuls to get off on the right frickin foot.

Even more so than Aaron Rowand, Edgar Renteria's scorching start has to be taken seriously. While Row had a few hits and ribeye steaks in Wednesday's finale, we all know that his lack of discipline and approach at the plate leaves us all uneasy... seemingly constantly. Renteria, on the other hand, excites me.

Last season was unacceptable on so many fronts for the Colombian vet. It was just so inexcusable that he was allowed to play so terribly for so long last year when management knew he was injured.

For what it's worth though, he deserves "gamer points" for playing hurt, never once speaking to the media about it, and doing his best. Gamer points or not though, he still has a lot to prove to Giants fans who at this point still have him in their crosshairs.

In this opening series we appear to have seen the old Edgar Renteria-- as opposed to the "Old Balls" Renteria of '09. In the past three days, I've seen flashes of the guy who has four .300+ average seasons under his belt. And hell, I've even seen some solid defense from him.

We'd all love to have a guaranteed beast out there at SS and in the second spot, but we all know that Rich Aurilia circa 2001 is not walking through that door. What we potentially have here is an aged version of the 2007 Edgar Renteria, who hit .332.

Trust me, that's miles better than the antique version we got in '09.

I know it's optimistic, but hell, why can't I be? The guy went 5-5 on Wednesday, and appears to be totally healthy. Honestly, he looks nothing like the player we knew.

And let's keep in mind that we shouldn't be discriminatory in our optimism either. Many of us keep saying, "Well Aubrey Huff is only one year removed from a huge season."

I know I've said that...

Well, Edgar is two years removed from a huge season. Hey, just saying...

The other aspects of the team speak for themselves. I really don't see a need right now to comment too much on the pitching. Lincey is a monst. HurriCAIN Matt is a stud (shame he got the ND though), and Brian Wilson looks like he's trying to commit involuntary manslaughter out there with his fastball.

The one guy who really deserves plaudits thrown his way is Barry Zito. I'm allllmost the point where I'm taking his excellent starts for granted... as if it would be unusual for him to suck.

Lest we forget that he's been garbage early in the previous three seasons for us (in addition to other parts of the season too!). With this in mind, getting 6 shutout innings from Zeets is like melting cheese over the entire team, it just makes it SO. GODDAMN. GOOD.

(Even with those asinine striped socks...)

Anyway, I hope you all make it out to one of the Atlanta games this weekend, crank the John Fogerty, Kenny Rogers, and Alabama, and start to get fired up...

...because I think we are in for one epic season here boys and girls!.

---------------------------------------------

Notes & Thoughts

-- Atta boy Johnny Bowker. The guy appears to be for real. And who told you so?

-- Good to see the bench guys like A.U. Velez, Whiteside, Schierholtz, and Ishikawa contribute. Good to get 'em all off the schneid at once.

-- Looks like we're going to see a pattern of defensive replacements every 7th inning if we have a lead. Ishikawa takes over for Huff at 1B and Schierholtz takes over in RF for Bowker. The move I don't understand is A.U. Velez taking over for DeRosa in LF. Yes, he's faster, but is The Pharaoh a better outfielder? Really friggin questionable. However, I do like the "WE PLAY TO WIN THE GAME!" approach by Bochy to take zero chances of losing any games because of defense. Hey if we had won 4 or 5 more games last year, that woulda meant playoffs.

-- Sammy Gervacio sucks at life. His little "Voodoo/Santeria priest at an animal sacrifice ceremony" bit is already old, and I'm almost glad that he had to leave the game on Wednesday with an apparent shoulder injury. It's unacceptable to do that crap out there, and the act is not appreciated by the opposition let alone his own team.

Think about it. If you're the Astros, you've got some cocky punk out there doing a street performer bit before every pitch? You're not going to come sprinting to the guy's side when an opposing player finally tells him to knock it off.

That crap isn't baseball. Go back to the Dominican League if you want to dance around like a jerk. That doesn't fly up here. If you cannot see this video above, click here.

Also, check out my interview with the Astros' Bud Norris if you haven't already done so. Come on, how many fan blogs get to talk to real major leaguers? Haha.

Let's hope Hollywood Norris can stop the Astros' skid against Philly on Friday.

MLB Extra Innings is on a free preview, so you can watch ANY GAME YOU WANT! IT'S MAGICAL!

Glad that one's over... On to Cincinnati

Despite the split in New York, it just didn't feel very satisfying. I suppose that's what splits will do to you...

A few observations on the Mets and Citi Field first though:

--The Mets are a team in shambles. Injuries have just racked this squad and you can tell its players are just barely hanging onto relevance. With David Wright now out for awhile, they simply have no one out there to lead the replacements. I've always loved Jeff Francoeur and Gary Sheffield, but neither are real leaders.

Then again, were Delgado, Jose Reyes, or Carlos Beltran?

Oh yeah, I forgot, this has been why they've collapsed year after year.

--I've always thought Mets manager Jerry Manuel to be somewhat of a dunce. He stabbed Willie Randolph in the back last year, and Manuel was dopey with the White Sox too. I never cared for him. But now... well now, I've really got a reason.

He also once said, "I don't like to rely on stats."

So flip a coin, Jerry.

Whether or not Manuel ordered the two retaliatory bean balls or whether the artist formerly known as Johan Santana did that on his own accord... pretty classless moves overall. That goes back to the culture and leadership of the Mets. That is on Jerry Manuel.

Matt Cain is not malicious, and he never would have hit anyone in the head on purpose, especially a class act like David Wright. To hit both Sandoval and Bengie was blatant and unacceptable-- not to mention totally unwarranted.

Absolutely moronic and classless.


--Citi Field looks, well... how do I put this?

Lame.

It looks like a futuristic version of old Shea Stadium. There are no background views, ridiculous wind tunnels, too much foul territory, and unhappy fans. There is zero about this stadium on television that makes it stand out. It's something like a bland version of Philadelphia and Washington. The best part about this stadium are the colorful ads. Seriously. The old school Pepsi sign is my favorite thing.


The trademarks of all new stadiums are the architectural styling, bold lines, and skyline backdrops. There are subtle and bold examples of this. Pittsburgh has a great view of the city, San Diego has the old brick building, Houston has the hill in center and the train tracks, Cincy has the riverboat smoke stacks, Milwaukee has the Bernie Brewer Slide. Hell, even the refurbished Kauffman Stadium in Kansas City looks better than Citi Field.

New York City has so many things to work with, and they just blew it. Like Nationals Park in D.C., there is nothing about this place that stands out. It honestly looks depressing in there. I see a nearly totally enclosed, cavernous, nearly Three Rivers Stadium-esque ballpark with bizarre dimensions.

Pathetic.

--As for the Giants, it was a so-so effort. Granted, the 10-1 win on Monday as well as the 10th inning win on Saturday felt good. It's just the other times when we can't put any offense together that just drag us down. Let's hope the awakening that occurred in the series finale can carry over into Cincinnata (that's how they say it).

-- Stay hot A.U. Velez! He's hitting .500 in the past two games with 2 runs and 2 RBI. He's now hitting .306 on the season.

I've been one of his harshest, most vulgar critics, but he's slowly but surely winning me over. He seems to be somehow getting how to hit. His plate discipline is greatly improved, and he's currently impersonating an offensive catalyst. Imagine that... a real leadoff hitter.

I would like to see him more active as a base stealer though. Despite his speed, he's only attempted to steal 3 times, being caught once.

--Bochy will have to make some decisions about the outfield. With A.U. and Nate The Great ripping the balls all over the place, how can they be kept out of the lineup? Randy Winn needs to sit. We are in a Wild Card race here, and despite his 4/9 stretch over the past two games, he should be the odd man out. All Schierholtz does is hit, and his arm is Francoeur-like. It's a sin not to start him every day.

-- Did you know, Randy Winn's real name is Dwight Randolph Winn?

-- Did you also know that D.R. Winn (Doctor Winn anyone?) is making $9.6 million dollars this season?

-- Did you know that Noah Lowry is being paid $4.5 million this season?

-- Did you know that when we released Dave Roberts earlier this year, we were required to continue paying him his $6.5 million dollar salary?

-- Aaron Rowand, Randy Winn, Noah Lowry, and Dave Roberts cost the Giants a total of $32.6 million this season alone. The stats we got from these four guys (obviously Rowand and Winn as of Sunday): .264 avg, 101 runs, 11 HR, 89 RBI, 14 SB.

That would be a really nice season for Matt Kemp or Bobby Abreu. Doesn't that just make your stomach churn?

-- Happy Lincecum day everyone! Homer Bailey is on the mound for the Reds on Tuesday. If you were ever going to bet on baseball... this would be the game.

--Breaking news as I'm writing this. Stephen Strasburg signs with the Nats for just under $16 million. Awesome. I'm so glad they didn't give him more. Eff you Scott Boras.

-- The Giants also signed the 6th overall pick, RHP Zack Wheeler. They gave him just under $3.3 million. Wheeler, out of HS in Georgia, had a 0.54 ERA in his senior season. He steps into the system void left by the trades of Scott Barnes and Timmy Alderson. Godspeed young Wheeler. Godspeed.

Umps on the take? Russell Martin a bitch? A series to forget.

The headline there says it all.

It's truly difficult to stomach what happened in this three game disaster. Despite our triumphant middle finger of a win today in extras, it still feels like we got swept. We endured the WORST umpiring I think I've ever seen in my life over a series. It was ONE CALL AFTER ANOTHER. If Gary Darling's crew was on the take, they sure as shoot did a terrible job of hiding it... which is why I think they just suck, instead of having zero integrity or decency.

By my count, there were between 8 and 10 HUGE blown calls this weekend... the most egregious of which occurred today.

You all probably saw the games, but there were two obviously blown calls at first when Dodgers hitters should've been out-- one of which tied up the game in the 9th inning and took away Lincey's gem of a game away.

There was one questionable call that could have had Manny picked off at first (which got Bochy ejected). After A.U. Henio upended Russell Martin at home, Kung Fu was blatantly hit on the elbow by McDonald... and after the ensuing brouhaha, he ended up with a strike on him. Then, later after Pandoval did a Saturday Night Fever disco splits move to avoid a tag from Castro, he was called out, and Schierholtz appeared safe at first. Well, Gary Darling reversed the "out" call on Sandoval, but then forgot to watch first base, calling Nate the Great out.

Kruk and Kuip were livid. After the game, Krukow said it was "...absolutely the worst umpiring I've ever seen in a series... and I've seen a lot of games."

Even Greg Papa was pissed in the CSN studios.

---------------------------Quick Side Note--------------------------------

I love JT Snow and he was a great Giant. That being said, he looks worse than Obama up there reading the teleprompter. He's like a zombie on TV. Get this guy a couple of whiskey sours before he goes on. Loosen up bro, you talking about baseball on TV... I hate to say this, but you could really learn something from Bip Roberts. (I know... I can't believe I said it either.)

--------------------------End Side Note----------------------------------

Anyway, the series was pretty much a disaster, and it could've been worse, if the Giants hadn't been able to overcome the terrible umpiring, their own buffoonery in the field, and ineptitude with runners in scoring position. They left 13 guys on base. Not good.

On a more positive note, Timmy once again was the stopper we needed. I love Roy Halladay, but Lincecum is the best pitcher in baseball. The guy literally needs 2 runs to win and will give you at least 8 innings every fifth day.

I sure hope that the victory that Gary Darling & Co. cost him today doesn't leave him a couple votes shy of his second Cy Young. That would be a travesty.

Also, A.U. continues to hit. He stroked one into Mirabelli/Finley alley today and managed to score AND take out the waste of space named Russell Martin.

Yet another dirty French Canadian on the Dodgers who totally sucks. That's right. You separatist jerks are in Canada. You don't get your own country. Go back to France if you don't like it.

A.U. undercut him with gazelle-like speed and wildebeest-like power. Martin ended up on his ass in obvious discomfort. Martin should ride the bench more often, considering he only has 3 HR and 33 RBI on the year. What a loser.

On the next pitch, tempers flared when Pandoval was hit on the elbow by James McDonald. Pablo was about to Kung Fu his ass before being led away.

In a moment that made me fired up to be a Giants fan, the benches cleared and craziness ensued.

Despite no punches being thrown, it was a great moment-- one of the best this season. The crowd went nuts and went into a "Beat LA" frenzy.

The best part could have been Edgar Renteria.

Not hitting much and severely declining in range, Edgar (who wasn't playing) made a beeline for the out of control Russell Martin and attempted to take him downtown to Chinatown.

Hey, he's got the right idea. Giants fans will ease up on you when you go all out like that.

Just like Juan Uribe, who made yet ANOTHER retarded error in the field today. What did he do? He slammed a dong halfway the bleachers in left. And showed up Guillermo Mota...

Expect Mota to drill someone next time... remember he's the guy who sent Prince Fielder into a bloodlust after he nailed the burly Brewers slugger last week.

On to New York.

If I had the money, I'd be there, drunk in the stands telling all the Mets fans to go back to Jersey. (They hate that).

Quick Notes:

-- Russell Martin was wearing a jersey today that said "J. Martin" on the back. What is that about? I guess the Dodgers just suck so badly that they can't even get their own uni's right.

-- The Giants made up another injury so that they could spare the embarrassment and PR nightmare of releasing Rich Aurilia. They probably put a bunch of injuries in a hat and drew "ankle tendonitis" out. Probably more believable than "swine flu" or "lacerated tonsil."

I thought it was over a few weeks ago, and wrote a nice little piece about him that you should check out. I don't expect to see him on the field again. Sorry Rich.

-- I've said the following, out loud, about A.U. Henio twice: "He seriously looks like an alien had sex with a gazelle".

Both times, he's homered. Swear to God.

--Umpire Bill Hohn (the jerk with the moustache) who blew two plays at first base on Monday and called a terrible game behind home plate on Tuesday, has drawn the ire of Atlanta Braves fans as well. This "Bleacher Report" article rails on him too.

He's ejected 5 Atlanta Braves in two games behind the dish this season, including the mild mannered Chipper Jones and Brian McCann.

The McCann incident was particularly absurd, because "Stache" as the article calls him, "...followed B-Mac to the dugout."

-- The Mets have a spot starter brought in from the bullpen to start the series opener. Sounds good. Maybe we can tee off on the SOB.

--A third umpire of Gary Darling's crew, Bruce Dreckman, has also pissed off the masses a time or two. This article details how Dreckman is a hothead who is known to accelerate and exacerbate problems and arguments.

I say break up this hellraising crew.

-- So Bochy and Ron Wotus get tossed... what's the succession if everyone gets thrown out? I guess it would go like this: Bochy, Ron Wotus, Tim Flannery, Dave Righetti, Carney Lansford, Mark Gardner, Roberto Kelly, Billy Hayes. Then what? Player manager? Bullpen catchers? Do Zito and Cain strap on helmets and coach first and third base like kids in Little League? Would they have to forfeit? Very interesting scenario.

I tried to find something about it here in MLB's Official Rulebook, but I don't think they have anything about it. Could this ever happen?

I could've happened today.

With Bochy already tossed, it is conceivable that all of the coaching staff could have been ejected during the brawl for fighting... leaving only a flustered Roberto Kelly to manage his first game.

Kelly would have argued several of the blown calls at the insistence of Aaron Rowand, and gotten tossed. God I hope that happens someday.

It would be AWESOME.

Keep rooting against the Rockies! Onto Queens!